Innovation… anyone?

This was the header of the newspaper this morning… I read it walking my way to the elevator on our neighbour’s front door (my only true ‘news reading’ is a 3 seconds stop to know if the world is coming to an end… or not… mostly not).
Bearing in mind the fact that I consider myself a most boring person, with a square type personality, set to become an hermit before turning fifty, reading my books and drinking coffee.. The newspaper’s header touch my self-esteem and I decided to write a bit about true innovation… the one that happens every day, even though it doesn’t get notice by the whole population of the world, mainly my husband, my dog and me.
Cooking… innovative cuisine is something that you’ve to experiment by default when moving to a new country were ‘calabaza’ is “butternut squash” or “pumpkin”… or ‘semillas de cajuil’ is “cashews… or ‘tomillo’ is “thyme”… just by going to the grocery store you get confuse by all the different names and even though you have your grandma’s recipe with you to get everything for that chicken casserole, parsley gets confused with basil, and so on… at the end, you have what it looks like a chicken casserole but smells like an Indian dish… all spiced up and smelling strong.
Drinking… innovative drinking comes with the territory when living abroad. One always has to try new brands, flavours, drinks. I’m a weak drinker, so other than a different juice flavour, I don’t try new stuffs, however, my husband and I made a trip to the vineyards and came back addicted to ‘wine-a-rita’… so I have to consider that as an innovation in my life.
Dressing… innovative dress codes are a given when you live in one of the Fashion capitals of the world… I would have never consider to use leggings before (my big butt and all), but here, leggings are a fashion statement that improves your appearance while making you look sleek and cool.
Pet Care… yes, as you know, I have a dog and he’s also been innovating on his diet (orange treats that taste like pork, or green treats that make your mouth smell like grass) and on his care routine… with special “play days” with his mates from the vet’s office or grooming sessions to improve his looks.
Technology… the most important innovation of this generation.
Since I’ve moved to NY I’ve acquired a razor for sweaters, a nail trimmer for dogs, a ultra light, ultra thin, ultra fast hair dryer, an iPad (for my hubby), 4 iPhones (we change them every year) and an egg cooker that can do amazing omelettes, eggs Benedict and poached eggs in less than 3 minutes.
So… to the New York Times editor that choose that header to come out on the Wednesday edition… please revise your choices for a selling front cover and try to asses more important matters, like traffic jams on the Long Island Express way to improve my driving time to work, or the subway on the 2nd avenue, so my husband doesn’t have to ride the subway like in a sardines can every afternoon, or even grocery prices, so I don’t have to travel 40 miles to do my grocery shopping in ShopRite at a reasonable price.

Innovation… everyone? Duh!

Seasoning that pours out of you

Have you ever pondered over the expression: ‘it doesn’t suit me’?

For example, I have this weak stomach and I try to eat pretty blandly because nothing ‘suits me’…no, I’m not referring to clothes (even thought that is your first perception when you hear the frase), I’m referring to the fact that anything that I eat (out of cheese, bread, yogurt and green vegetables) does not sit well on my stomach.
After several months of eating like a two-year-old, all the insipid, wishy-washy food tastes like crap; so in my attempts to spicy up my dinner a bit, I decided to try some new seasonings… or better said, the same old flavours, but applied to new dishes.
Thursday night is on us, so my husband and I opened a bottle of wine and started perusing the refrigerator for an ounce of inspiration regarding our dinner options.
I love baked food… anything that fits in an oven, so I decided to do some Bruschettas and cut some cheese, to go with it. Since I can’t eat tomato (the main ingredient for this dish) I started mixing several spices into the mozzarella to create a culinary rarity (maybe I was going to be famous for it), and more importantly, to avoid have to eat plain Bread & Cheese yet again.
We removed the sizzling dish from the oven and in a silent ceremony; we separated our Bruschettas… tomato for my husband…‘weird looking cheese’ for me.
At first, the explosion of flavour was too much to handle… it was so long since I tasted anything that… ‘tasty’ (excuse the repetition). The cheese melted with the garlic, oregano, salt, nutmeg, olive oil… simply: incredible!

(5 minutes later)
I noticed that my skin was oozing a particular scent… body odour plus something else… so I decided to take my night shower and get it off me before my husband would notice that he had a smelly wife.

(10 minutes later)
Even my nails had a particular aroma… while I tried to decipher the reason that I smelled like a decaying old lady, my husband enter our room and said:

- My god! What is that smell? (ugly smell face)

I couldn’t possibly tell him that I was decomposing so I just mastered my ‘innocent’ face and looked dumbfounded while thinking: I’m positively dying!

(1 second later)
Of course!
The garlic!
I was breathing an aura of garlic that even an individual with an olfactory deficiency wouldn’t miss.
I breathed a sigh of relief, I wasn’t dying after all… and I told my husband:

- It’s me honey… it seems the garlic, doesn’t suit me after all (sweet wife face)

And then:

- Get used to it, because we still have 8 hours of sleep to do and I’m positively sure that I’ll be emanating our Bruschettas in the process… my skin will be complaining of my dinner choice all night (rude wife face)… and don’t even think about sleeping on the sofa.

Karma is what I’m dreading… one thing is me with a ‘Garlic Aura’… another completely different thing is my husband with another type of aura… onion, pepperoni, red pepper...
C-R-A-P!

Anniversary for us… for you… or for me?

Last week was my two year anniversary with my husband and I had this plan in my head that I could master an elegant dinner, candles, wine and the whole nine yards… playing make-believe that I could pull off a Hot-Housewife routine with my tight schedule.

Who was I kidding?

I arrived to our home after work and made a quick stop at the supermarket to buy ingredients to cook something meat-related (my husband was born a vegetarian and transformed into carnivorous, I assume, a well played move from the cosmos, considering that he’s married with an Argentinean, who her meal by default is cow-related)… I already had the wine bottle (a treat from my father who has achieve the hard task of exporting our Malbec wine to NY) and I was only missing the ambience.

I got home and quickly decided to take a shower and transform my persona from an ordinary working woman into a spectacular cooking super-hot-mama-wife (black dress and high heels included). After some light make-up, I headed for the kitchen, arrange my apron and started the preparations.

I first set the table, lit some candles, turned-on the music… so far so good; I started getting a bit hot (surely because of the anxiety), buy not a big deal.
Thanks to being in the XXI Century, A/C’s are a commodity in every house, so I started them full blast and continued my tasks.

I chopped veggies and made some fresh salad… some cheese to start… I was getting hotter by the minute and while chopping I took resting minutes and I fanned myself with a napkin.
Then I started the meat on the Cuisinart electric grill; and I could feel my brow getting wet, sweat running down my back, my hair getting all messed-up and entangled, humidity running my make-up… definitely not a good portrait.
At that particular moment, my husband decided to appear… I don’t know how Lucy or Angie or Kim or Jenny can manage a Super Model Housewife act, but I assure you, that they never tried the routine while cooking real food!
A headache, made an assault in my temples at that same instant, and I stopped dead still against the counter hoping that a spinal realignment might ease the squeeze in my skull… no luck, maybe a cranial amputation would work an I could have the excuse not to present myself to my husband as a sweaty (not at all appealing) wife.
However (and that’s why I love him like crazy), just one glance from him and I knew he was planning something different…I could smell the gourmet meal being cook by a chef at a fancy restaurant by just looking at him; he wanted to go out… and so do I!

I’m so hard-headed, you could have hit my frontal lobe with a crowbar and made no impression whatsoever; but just that one stare resigned me completely to the dumb idea that I could manage to cook while avoiding sweating like a pig in the middle of the summer. I mean, surprises are well deserved and enjoyed, but for an Anniversary, it’s better if the surprise it’s for both of us.

Closing my eyes, I sent up a prayer to anyone who was listening; asking please, for God’s sake, keep sending me signals that we were right for each other.
I’d read the books, seen the movie.... I knew every reason that aligned us, and I was so damn happy that; stubbornness and all; I am still perfectly loved by him.

Needless to say that after another shower, I was Hot-Mamma again and ready to head out…
Who knows…? I might have even gotten lucky… or him… or both.

Wine: Fabre Montamyou Malbec 2007 (www.67wines.com)